It's been a while, i've tried to forget, but i've got an axe to grind (maybe misplaced phrase) and I need cold hard cash. Halifax Plc have, in their infinate wisdom, slapped £70 of bank charges on me. Not wanting to raise my blood pressure, I won't go into the finer details / tell you about my teary phonecall to their 'help'desk.
Right, so, I have a motive. And a target. And a bank balance with black numbers. I need to win £70. It should be possible, i'm an educated man, I work in the city, I don't dot I's with a loveheart, I wear brown shoes, i'm a supreme being... ooo I have QQ.. brb.......
Gah, tossers folded pre-flop.
Now, this may shock you, but overall in my poker career i'm probably down. I know, it shocked me too. So, on to tonight, $100 into Pkr, $50 into Pokerstars. If I turn the $150 into $300 then I should have my £70 back. Pkr is an odd place. Not many users, all of whom play hold 'em, regardless of whether the table is playing Omaha. The majority go by the rule of 4 cards = good hand. AA82 = good hand, that sort of thing. My $100 is currently $125, rather fortuitous circumstances, but circumstances never the less.
Right, i'm on PKr for the cash omaha, pokerstars for the MTT hold 'em
Pokerstars Tourney #1 - $5.50 NL - QQ v AK out busted shit.
#2 - $11 20k Gtd - still in at time of writing.
#3 - $11 10k Gtd 1R1A - still in at time of originally mispelling 'writing'.
Kinda doing nowt on PKR... nowt at all.
Now playing $.5/$1 Omaha on PKR, sat down with $10, quadrupled first hand. I'm super.
Reached the break on #2 & #3, pretty much the same as what I started with. On $32 from $10 on PKR...
#4 - $3.30 NL rebuy 40k gtd
Shhh.. shh.... SHHHHHHH.. whisper it, i'm up. Fingers on lips.
It's 0127, time for a stat check with a blancmange stained Jim White. Just kidding, it's not Blancmange, it's blood. Understand that, sky sports poon. I digress.
#2 - $11 20k Gtd - 7680 chips, 382/1221
#3 - $11 10k Gtd 1R1A - 4180 chips, I ignored the rebuy & add-on, I dont need that shit. Currently 691/755. Maybe I did need it...
#4 $3.30R 40k Gtd 3190 chips, 0 rebuys, 1164/2825. 0 rebuys.
PKR - $145. Currently playing a $5 Omaha MTT. 38 runners, shit pot... ooooo QUADS!
0134 - Tourney #2, now at 17560 after 2 rather super plays.
0138 - Tourney #2, now at 27195. After AA twice, cracked AA with 78 diamonds. Fuck, i'm running like Usain Bolt.
0140 - When was the last time I ran like this? Computa, produce the stats!.... never is the answer. Doubled up one th 3.30 rebuy. Flushing nute on Pkr and holding 2 lots of KK on pokerstars. Jesus.
0142 - Who needs correct spelling when you're winning? Fat Mur is Fat.
0145 - Busted out of the tourney I wasn't doing all that amazing in/ #3 I think it was. Currently 13/895 pm Tourney #2. 3/29 in the PKR tourney.
0204 - Fucking yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy All in 25k with AA v KK, holds up and now 3rd from 760 with 48890. Awooga!
0222 - Currently looking at:
#2 - $11 20k Gtd - 45290 chips, 7/555
#4 - $3.30R 40k Gtd - 3437 chips, 0 rebuys, 1999/2953. 0 rebuys. That's none. Zeyro.
#5 - $8.80 12k Gtd - 4395 chips, 300/1365
PKR - $145. Currently playing a $5 Omaha MTT. 38 runners, 15 left, currently 9th.
Been a while since I was so well placed in a big MTT. I wonder how i'll fuck it up. I reckon it'll be chasing an inside straight draw for no apparent reason.
0239 - Trebled my stack in tourney #3, hit a splendiferrous flsuh on the river. 19345 chips 159th from 2695. At the break. no rebuy needed. I'm just that damn good.
0243 - Shit, just spunked 11k chips 99 v QK (offsuit. Knob.) Down to 36k. Think i'll mark myself 'away' for a bit.
0250 - 377 people left, of which 306 are paid. Not sure if i'd be happy with 306th. I probably would be if it was a choice between that or 307th. Currently 46th, so i'd have to have a complete brainfart to piss my chips into the wind here. I could do with a piss actually..
0254 - 77th... shit shit shit swimming the wrong way......
0307 - 93rd.....94th.....95th.... fuck, 97th!.... should really start playing hands. Down to 28000...
0313 - When I look back on this (most likely abandoned) blog in a years time I hope i'm looking back with pride in my Great British eyes, rather than thinking 'what a tit'. 307 left, 306 paid... i'm about 110th. Haven't played a hand for half an hour. Not through choice, I haven't hit shit.
0316 - I'm in the money. Pretty much crap money until top 10. Not a fucking chance i'll get there.
0325 - What a call, what a ruddy lovely call. on BB, 1k/2k Some goober goes AI with his last 10k. I have QK suited. He doesn't. He has K10. He hits his 10. I tell the cat "this is fucking typical". I hit my Q. The cat is unmoved. I have 40k in chips, a lovely warm brew, and a big hairy pussy between my legs. Ripper!
0329 - Still hanging tough in tourneys #2 & #4:
#2 - $11 20k Gtd - 29565 chips (dont ask), 111/216
#4 - $3.30R 40k Gtd - 26719 chips, 0 rebuys, 287/1560.
0345 - Fucking hell, teeth, skin, of. QK suited again wins the day. I'll just sit here flexing for a few minutes in the light of that awesomeness.
0401 - Just heard Nicky Butt has called his new son Harry. I dunno, sounds a bit fishy to me...
0416 - Out of 1 tourney and damn sure nearly out of another.... now 108th from 108. Not good.
0420 - Out. 104th. Goodnight Vienna. $37 for 4 hours 20 minutes of play. What was the fucking point? Still, same time tomorrow methinks...
0453 - Still here, entered a rather shoddy looking MTT on PKR. Only $10 but it's gone from 143 people to 8 and i'm sat in 3rd with 117816 chips. $380 to the winner so not all bad.
0456 - Lost half of my stack on 2 rivers. Why the fuck did I blog? What a twunt.
0506 - 5 left, am 3rd.... ACES!!!!!!... ADN THEY HOLD UP!! 5 left, am very much in 2nd place.
0509 - 3 left, it's the break, i'm going for a poo. $157 gtd.
0510 - The cat (moth hunting earlier) has just thrown up at least 3 bits of moth, along with half its stomach lining. That's rather sullied my winning.
0513 - Quads. Heads up!
0514 - 482k (not me) v 200k (me). I'm not optimstic.
0520 - I'm actually winning.. 670k palys 60k....
0522 - WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!! J4 v 23 - 44 on flop, 4 on turn, quads, win, epic.
0528 - Drink it in my afro haired avatar chum. It's been a long time coming.
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